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What household item can i use as a dildo? no food items , and i want to train myself to deep throat , so something i can use orally is what i'm looking for. | | get a cheap dildo | Is my bf training me up to be like his ex ? Ok so im 18 and i have a bf who is older, he's 30. Im happy with the age gap and so is he but there are a few problems that wont leave my mind. His ex girlfriend who he was with was 27 and they were together for about 7 years, i found some really dirty porn pics of her and other guys ALONG with my bf messing about with her and to be honest it freeked me out. It kind of worrys me i mean its not abit dirty ITS UNREAL IV NEVER SSEEN ANYTHING SO, DDISGUSTING Im worried he's going to want me to do all that crap with him and it doesn't look nice at all.
The other night we were having sex and he tried to but a HUGE dildo inside me aswell as HIM. It hurt and it kind of put me of, maybe its because im not use to stuff like that WHAT SHOULD I DO!
am i over reacting ??
Or is he training me up to be like his ex, it sure feels like that... | | Most older men mostly only want younger girls for sex and he probably more than likely in the long run is probably going to get to do those things. I think you should feel comfortable enough to speak up when he's doing something you don't like in bed. I think you should confront him about the photos you've found and tell him you're not into that or ready for it. | Mmmm... bondage? what is h/s and w/s? My mother works as a dominatrix and i found her flyer in a phone box. i know she is involved in dildo training and bondage but I couldn't work out what h/s and w/s is. Someone please enlighten me =] | i'm not sure what the h/s is for but the w/s usually stands for watersports
this might help:
en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_BDS…
k | Are these hard jobs or am I a lazy dildo? So far I never like left a job peacefully, it's always quitting because I hate it or getting fired. My first job was working as a photographer in Ohio, I had to chase after people at an amusement part at 100 degree heat. So I didn't show up till they fire me. Than I got my university business degree and had to sell conferences over the phone (that was after the market crash of 2008). We had to make 130 calls per day, and most of the time were told to piss off. Than I tried selling same thing for another company we had to make 60 calls per day. So I left too. All of those were minimal wage or + commission. Last one was a telemarketing, I just did paid training and never showed up. Now I just run my own business, and hopeful won't have to work for anyone else ever.
I never had to sell oranges on a highway or shingle roofs for a living but how do those fare with jobs you had | They're not hard jobs but they're s h i t t y jobs....
1st job is a job suited for a 15 year old
All commission jobs are scams
telemarketing is the worst job ever | What should I do about this Dream!??!?!?!? So I had this dream last night and I want to know what it means.
So it was one of those lucid dreams that felt real.
I warn you its extremely sexual and deviate.
I remember waking up in a pink heart shaped bed.
So my adventure started in a episode of Hannah Montana, all I can really remember about it was having hot passionate and quite disturbing sex with Miley Cyrus while her father stood over us and critiqued my every movement, still tonight I don't want to go to bed for the fear of Billy Ray Cyrus screaming "HARDER!".
Not to short after I rolled over and fell asleep in my dream, very odd I know, a dream inside of a dream. But in this dream it became even more abstract, I became sexually involved in a love circle with Minny and Mickey Mouse. Not long did I found out that Minny was actually a bio logically engineered version of Mickey wear make-up, just as they were both about to penetrate me in every orifice I awoke from my dream inside my dream ( I'm still dreaming). It was then I met a small very petite midget named Pete who had painted himself blue, he invited me to a party down in the local bar but I insisted I couldn't drink but he dragged me along anyway.
About 2 hours later I'm down at the bar getting hammered and I remembered seeing this insanely beautiful girl, I mustered up my courage and tampered over to her and asked her if she'd like to go get a room. She obliged. After a night of rigorous and painfully great sex I awoke in the morning; Clasped ever so tightly in the arms of a middle aged African American, as I felt his beard brush against my neck I jumped out of bed only to realize that I was now in knee deep marshmellow mix. The bed that was once in front of me began to change shape and morph into a colossal marshmellow shaped beast. He held out a golden rod shaped like a dildo, he gave me the task of penetrating and ending the rule the Evil Lord Gannonsmurf, it was then that I was transported 7 years back in time.
Just as I'm transported, I find myself in a marketsquare and I'm instantly besieged by Gannonsmurfs henchmen although they have superior fighting skills, I was able to fend them of and send them to the bowls of Hades with my golden dildo. I make a hasty getaway and retreat to an enormous mountain range just south of Gannonsmurfs great citadel; it is here I spend 3 years training with a secret tribe of tibetan monks who have mastered an art of Psycho-Molestation. It is with this power that I was able to single handedly destroy gannonsmurf and his legion of Hatchet wielding dwarfs.
At the Climax of the dream I'm standing over the sleeping form of Gannonsmurf as I am about to use my Psycho-Molestation techniques, the moonlight shines in through a nearby window and I realize that I notice this man. It's Pete from the Bar. It turns out Pete had went forward in time to stop me but the marshmellow beast had disguised himself has a enchanting woman to allure me and bestow upon me the tools of Petes demise. As this rush of knowledge hits me, I stare down at his body as I unleash the most graphic and unbelievable form of Sex Toy Foreplay on Pete. It was then dream ended.
I woke up in my neighbors house with a turkey baster and 3 dead bodies in the living room what should I do? I'm afraid I'll get in trouble! | LOL.
This is good stuff. | What should I do about this dream? So I had this dream last night and I want to know what it means.
So it was one of those lucid dreams that felt real.
I warn you its extremely sexual and deviate.
I remember waking up in a pink heart shaped bed.
So my adventure started in a episode of Hannah Montana, all I can really remember about it was having hot passionate and quite disturbing sex with Miley Cyrus while her father stood over us and critiqued my every movement, still tonight I don't want to go to bed for the fear of Billy Ray Cyrus screaming "HARDER!".
Not to short after I rolled over and fell asleep in my dream, very odd I know, a dream inside of a dream. But in this dream it became even more abstract, I became sexually involved in a love circle with Minny and Mickey Mouse. Not long did I found out that Minny was actually a bio logically engineered version of Mickey wear make-up, just as they were both about to penetrate me in every orifice I awoke from my dream inside my dream ( I'm still dreaming). It was then I met a small very petite midget named Pete who had painted himself blue, he invited me to a party down in the local bar but I insisted I couldn't drink but he dragged me along anyway.
About 2 hours later I'm down at the bar getting hammered and I remembered seeing this insanely beautiful girl, I mustered up my courage and tampered over to her and asked her if she'd like to go get a room. She obliged. After a night of rigorous and painfully great sex I awoke in the morning; Clasped ever so tightly in the arms of a middle aged African American, as I felt his beard brush against my neck I jumped out of bed only to realize that I was now in knee deep marshmellow mix. The bed that was once in front of me began to change shape and morph into a colossal marshmellow shaped beast. He held out a golden rod shaped like a dildo, he gave me the task of penetrating and ending the rule the Evil Lord Gannonsmurf, it was then that I was transported 7 years back in time.
Just as I'm transported, I find myself in a marketsquare and I'm instantly besieged by Gannonsmurfs henchmen although they have superior fighting skills, I was able to fend them of and send them to the bowls of Hades with my golden dildo. I make a hasty getaway and retreat to an enormous mountain range just south of Gannonsmurfs great citadel; it is here I spend 3 years training with a secret tribe of tibetan monks who have mastered an art of Psycho-Molestation. It is with this power that I was able to single handedly destroy gannonsmurf and his legion of Hatchet wielding dwarfs.
At the Climax of the dream I'm standing over the sleeping form of Gannonsmurf as I am about to use my Psycho-Molestation techniques, the moonlight shines in through a nearby window and I realize that I notice this man. It's Pete from the Bar. It turns out Pete had went forward in time to stop me but the marshmellow beast had disguised himself has a enchanting woman to allure me and bestow upon me the tools of Petes demise. As this rush of knowledge hits me, I stare down at his body as I unleash the most graphic and unbelievable form of Sex Toy Foreplay on Pete. It was then dream ended.
I woke up in my neighbors house with a turkey baster and 3 dead bodies in the living room what should I do? I'm afraid I'll get in trouble! | | either this person is reading too many fiction books, or is full of it. | Small Raised spots around penis? im 20 and have some sort of red raised spots around the ring of my penis head. i provided a picture to show where exactly the small raised spots are. its a picture of a dildo so dont be afraid to look. i've had these raised spots for a couple of years, they are really small, and i thought they were gonna go away, but i guess not. i dont know if its just a fungus or rash or god forbid worse. i Just know its NOT an STD. i feel no pain or nothin. I know i should have gone to the doc sooner but im shipping off to my CBT(combat basic training) for the Army. Guess i have to go after my training. Im actually scared its something serious.
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img48.imageshack.us/img48/1673/111xw6.jpg | | Those are definitely Pearly Penis Papules. I didn't know dildos came equipped with them. | Will this one will get you rollin? There was this guy staring his first day of employment at the local adult store.
The manager gets him all trained and then says he has to run some errand's and will have to leave him alone for awhile.
The first customer that comes in say's
"How much for that white dildo"
"that dildo is twenty dollars Ms."
"Great I'll take it"
The next customer that comes in say's
"How much for that black dildo"
"That dildo is thirty dollars Ms."
"Great I'll take it"
The next customer that comes in say's
"How much for that plaid dildo"
"that dildo is sixty dollars Ms."
"Great I'll take it"
When the manager returns he say's
"Well how'd you do"
"good" He say's
"I sold a white dildo for twenty bucks"
"Then I sold a black dildo fo thiry bucks"
"Then I sold my Thermos for sixty bucks" | | a very old woman walks into a porn shop shaking as she goes. the young man behind the counter grins and says "can i help you?" the old woman stutters "d-d-do y-y-ou sell p-p-pink d-d-dildos t-t-ten inches l-l-long?" the man says "of course we do, but don't you think you're a bit old for such things?" The old woman stutters "i'm n-n-not l-l-looking t-t-to b-b-buy one, I j-j-just c-c-can't r-r-remember how t-t-to t-t-turn the f-f-****** thing o-o-off!" and then she faints. | My wife and a personal trainer? My wife came home from the gym last week and basically attacked me. We had some of the best sex ever. I joked with her saying, what has gotten in to you? She laughed it off saying, "I can't tell you...you'll be jealous." Well, I could tell that it was one of those deals where she really wanted to tell me, so I persisted a bit. Smiling, she said, "You wanted to know. Don't be mad." She then proceeded to tell me that a black guy at her gym, who is a personal trainer, kept approaching her, flirting, and asking to train her. She said that it was just a naughty turn-on and did not mean anything negative toward me at all. She said she is a faithful women and would never cheat on me. She said that he just had a perfect body and, if she were single, she would "do" him. I wasn't mad. In fact, I enjoyed the benefits, sexually. Later, when i asked if she would like to try a big black dildo, she put her pillow over her face and sheepishly said, "Ok!" Is this harmless fun or a slippery slope? | | You should be worried !!! |
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